Are We Each Other's People?

Updated: Sep 20


My pix of Amelia's, CA (Now closed.)

Hello, my lovelies!


It's fun to see how many of you on my current newsletter mailing list are signing up for my new "Lovelies Lounge" which replaces my newsletter as of October 1, 2020. Welcome again! I'm glad to have you here. And if you're new to this page, or not sure whether you want to sign up, you might be asking yourself whether my Lounge is for you and/or what you're gonna get in your in-box if you sign up.


In other words: Are we each other's people?! And will it be worth it to you and/or enjoyable for my Lounge content/articles/tips to appear in your busy in-box once or max twice a week, give or take?


You're the only one who can decide that, and my post below might help you make that decision. Also, please note that if you later decide my Lounge is not for you after all, you can easily unsubscribe later.


You (and/or your friends) might like my Lovelies Lounge, if ...


*You're not perfect, (nor am I), but you do have high standards for your life overall and you keep trying to learn new things that will make you a better and more well-rounded person, no matter how old you are. (Life's a journey, and a school. And I'm still learning too!)


*You prefer a seaside bistro lunch of gourmet salad and tea, with classical music playing in the background, vs. an all-you-can-eat steak and potatoes diner on the side of the freeway, complete with twang-y music blaring. (Really twang-y music!)


*You love to putter around your home, whatever its size, and you like learning and trying out new DIY how-to organizing and cleaning and decorating tips and tricks to make it look and feel as cozy and "homey" as it can so that you and your family enjoy living there. (On the real-life budget that you have; no credit cards maxed to the limits to do so!)


*You aren't annoyed or offended by authors who write from a Christian worldview, as I do. (It's who I strive to be, as I know it, while being helped along by God's grace, as I believe we all are.)


*You'd rather stay at a Bed and Breakfast Inn, or decorate your own bedroom at home like one, than camp in a tent. (In the rain. By bears. With ants!)


*You realize that time is your life so you're always simplifying things, (or you want to learn how to do that better), so that you don't fritter your one precious life on this earth away. (On activities or expenses that you'll later regret.)


*You'd rather go to a classic movie matinee and to a white-tablecloths-lunch afterwards than attend a big expensive sporting event while eating hot dogs on a bleacher. Or, you'd rather snuggle up with a movie at home and eat gourmet popcorn in bed. (A pretty bed!)


*You love quotes from movies like: "I'm going back to dignity and grace; I'm going back to Charleston!" (Gone With the Wind movie) and ”I’ve got to do something about the way I look. I mean a girl just can’t go to Sing Sing with a green face.” (Breakfast at Tiffany's movie.)


*You use your unique God-given talents to serve others and don't try to be what you're not. (Because not being yourself doesn't help them OR you.)


*You don't like continual or high pressure sales pitches from websites or bloggers. (Because you can think for yourself about whether something is in your best interest! Here, you will find for sale my short DIY how-to tips eBooks, plus affiliate links* to products I like and want to share with my readers, but you can buy them if, and when, you feel they are right for you. Sales pressure not included!


*You like this quote: "I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself." --Mikhail Baryshnikov (Because you'd rather work on becoming your own best person rather than compete and compare with others.)


*You don't wear pajamas and slippers, a string bikini, a ball gown and high heels, or overalls and a baseball cap to the grocery store. (You understand the words "appropriate" and "moderation.")


*You like to problem-solve to get results that work well for you and your personality/learning style. (Rather than continually complain and spin your life wheels.)


*You consider someone telling you: "Oh, you're so Old School!" to be a huge compliment. A really huge compliment, since you don't say things in your everyday conversation like: "Be a Boss Babe!" and "Do It Like a Ninja!" or "Whatever!" and you instead prefer "old-fashioned" words like "Please, You're Welcome, and Thank you!")


*You remember, and liked, when dinner and conversation with other people meant you looked each other in the eye, talked, smiled, and were genuinely interested in what the other people had to say. (Vs. looking at a screen and mumbling into one's own cell phone world.)


*You like to use and learn about natural and gentle healthcare methods like herbs, essential oils, nutrition, and homeopathy, to name a few. (Because you value your health and want to empower yourself while also saving money on medical care.)


*You like keeping yourself well-groomed and comfy-yet-nicely-dressed, so in order to do so you enjoy learning new tips and ways to do that and ways to better organize your closet too. (For the lifestyle you live now and on the real-life budget you have.)


*You consider careful dollarwise spending, organized money management, and saving and investing to be not restrictive but really smart so that you can enjoy life now in your own way and also have the most secure financial future, vs. debting so much that you feel stressed or ashamed that you can't pay the rent on time or buy enough groceries. And if you need help in the money area, you're willing to learn. (And yes, my husband and I live a dollarwise lifestyle ourselves and yes, our finances are very organized. Every week. And also projected yearly and long term.)


*You are as happy sleuthing out "great finds" at a discount store or Goodwill as you would be walking through a luxury department store. (No large charge card limit required at the discount or thrift store, unlike that luxury department store where your charge card will easily rack-$-up, only for you to feel the pay-back-pain sooner than you'd think.)


*You don't want to go to a big perfume-laden mall that's buzzing with people and food-court odors too, but instead you long to shop, or do shop, at cute little boutiques with ornate mirrors, velvet curtains on the dressing room doorway, and a (crystal!) bowl of Andes Mints on the front counter. And the proprietor knows your name, and asks how your kids are. Or, you prefer to shop online for convenience and easier budgeting. (And yes, you know how to shop well online, or want to learn how better, and NO, you don't still use a typewriter.)


*You think cooking at home is overall enjoyable and healthier and if you're not good at cooking already, you'd like to learn how to make more simple, healthy meals. (Especially during a pandemic!)


*You'd rather spend time in a church than a bar. A quiet church. The kind without rock bands and with clergy who still wear flowing robes. (Any day of the year.)


*You prefer working from home and you continue to learn ways, or want to, to improve your productivity while also more easily integrating your work life with your home/personal life.


*You love cottages because they're charming, humble, and sweet. But you're equally enamored with castles because they're big, ornate, and dignified. (Like Downtown Abbey. But you don't want to live there and keep it all up or manage a staff; you just want to tour it!)


*You have a curious spirit and a bright mind. So you read and enjoy eBooks, blogs, and e-newsletters these days, and/or listen to podcasts, and you're learning how to (slowly) give up your DVDs. (No matter how old or young you are, because well -- these are our times!)


*You like to travel. Usually by car. Mostly to places kind of like this. Staycations and virtual armchair travel included. (Loud venues when you're on vacation are not for you.)


*You'd rather spend a day in a library or at an in-person bookstore than almost anywhere else other than your own home. (Perusing the stacks by topic included.)


*You prefer to spend quiet time with your spouse at home or out together having your own kind of fun rather than be a "girlfriend-groupie" gal pal or a "go out with the guys" type of guy. (It's good to know yourself well and rearrange your one precious life accordingly, don't you think?)


*You're an incurable romantic. (But you're also very down-to-earth.)


*You enjoy laughing. (But you don't like off-color humor or jokes that malign other people.)


*You're (almost) as comfortable having a casual picnic in the park as you are at a fine dining table with white linens and china. (A plaid wool blanket at the picnic.)


*You enjoy beautiful things and places, but you don't put on airs to try and impress others and you know that you, or anyone, can enjoy beautiful things without owning them. (Like pearls, colorful birds, old inns, gelato, finely-crafted furniture, zebra stripes, gorgeous buildings, shimmering lakes, high-thread-count sheets, lounging cats, interesting people, a silk blouse, a bright red apple, and remote sandy beaches.)


*You don't find swear words on floral drinking mugs, when you're trying to shop for a pretty gift, amusing. (On book covers, or throw pillows, either for that matter. You find it yet another sign of our society sliding further downhill.)


*You think organized people run their lives skillfully, not that they're uptight. (And you also realize that not everyone who is messy is lazy or unmotivated, but perhaps instead challenged in body, mind, money, or spirit.)


*You love the sign/saying "because nice matters" and maybe even have it hanging in your home. (In several rooms. Including the laundry room and bathroom. And the garage.)


*You try hard to walk your talk. (Me too, because we want to honor the life God gave us, and because we want to leave the world a better place while we were here, not because we feel overly entitled.)


*You love your spouse, after all these years, or if you're not married for whatever reason, you hope and dream for someone to come your way to marry, so that you can have that blessing, and be a blessing to them too. (You know that it works both ways.)


*You work hard, no matter what your job, and yes, that includes stay-at-home-Mom-or-Dad. But you also know when to shut the computer off and relax and have fun! (And yes, I do this myself.)


*You don't necessarily believe that your kids, if you have them, should be "seen and not heard," but you do think children need to be taught to be respectful, kind, thoughtful, and courteous and that they deserve that treatment also in return. (Kids become grown-ups one day and pass on what they have learned.)


*You like to dance in the kitchen. (Because you know it's easy exercise and it makes the food taste better!)


*You love flowers. All flowers. (Enough said!)


*You like to share who you are and how you live with others, but you also value your personal privacy and time, and therefore you understand that just because someone writes a blog, has a YouTube channel, posts on social media about their own home and life, or replies nicely to you by email, that it's not likely you'll ever have dinner together in person nor become ongoing email BFF either because everyone has limited time these days, and many obligations and priorities. (Even if they have simplified their life.) (But if someone seems a genuinely kind person and the stars all align, you never know -- a nice dinner invitation in person at a cute bistro might work out!)



Should YOU join my free Lovelies Lounge? I personally believe that feeling comfortable, and like you belong and can bloom somewhere, with the people who "feel like your people" is important, offline or online, so ...


My former home office/den in CA.

If you do want to join my new virtual Lounge, I look forward to lounging and adventuring together with you here!


“Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being.” --Goethe


If I and my Lovelies Lounge are not (or no longer) your cup of tea or spiced latte, then I understand. And I also sincerely wish you well on your life's journey and encourage you to find a place online or offline where you do feel you belong and are comfortable.


Many blessings for a beautiful life on this earth, whatever that means to you,


Kathryn :)



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© Kathryn Bechen 2020